Out of the Slump

Okay, so I've temporarily come out of the slump. Today I had a meeting with BG, one of my professors. I told him that I had to take an incomplete in his class to finish the final paper. Now, FYI, it is not a good idea to ask for an incomplete the day after the final paper is due. Nevertheless, he granted me one. It was a good meeting, but slightly overwhelming. I'm behind on stats, and I'm going to need more stats training to be competitive to publish and when I go on the job market. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I had no desire to do either.

I am meeting with the department chair, MP, on Friday. I had a heart to heart with one of my grad-student-mentors, Amy, yesterday (who advised that I talk to MP right away). This is what I told her: I'm a one-trick pony. I care only about women's rights, particularly reproductive rights. I have other things that I care about, like violence against women and same sex marriage, but I'm passionate about reproductive rights. I don't exactly care to learn about anything else. I only care about political science stuff such as voting behavior, social movements, and political participation only as it relates to reproductive rights. I want to make an impact in this area, but I'm not sure that this is how I want to do it. I'm not sure that teaching and doing research is how I want to work to protect reproductive rights. Although research is important, it's a slow process and there is no instant gratification. If there is anything that I am not, it is patient (just ask my mom). Making an impact through research is glacial and behind the scenes-- instead, I think that I want to be on the front lines. Anyway, I'm going to talk to MP to see if what my options are and how to break into public policy work. Don't worry, I'm not throwing in the towel ; I'm just looking to see what else I can do with a PhD that will further my goals.

Today our students took their final exam. I always get attached to my students and feel sad at the end of the quarter. I've gotten to know them, and I've seen them grow. I've spent this quarter pushing them to think outside of the box and challenging them to defend their viewpoints. Even thought I get sad when the quarter ends, I look on the bright side: Next quarter, I will have 65 or so new students to teach about politics. I never doubt that I have an impact on these students. Some may come and go, but I know that some genuinely appreciate my efforts. I know I'm not making revolutionaries, but if I can make politics fun and pain-free, then I've done my job. As my students turned in their exams, I think that they were a bit sad to see me go too. One of my students even gave me a hug (no, it wasn't a guy trying to hit on me). It was one of the nicest things that any student has ever done.

In other news, I'm making squares for Warm Up America! It is this charity that sews together knit squares into afghans for homeless people. Here is a checkerboard square:

Sink or Swim

On Saturday night, my friends and I went to the UCI Men's Basketball game against Cal State Fullerton. We cheered as loudly as we could, but it wasn't enough; we lost 81-66. Nevertheless, our team had never made it so far in the post season. We are sad that the season has ended, but we are excited to cheer on the baseball team this spring.

It's finals week and the quarter is winding down. I've temporarily fallen out of the slump and feel better after having talked to a couple older grad students in the program. Apparently, the slump is not uncommon and many grad students have felt like throwing in the towel during their first few years. In attempts to remedy the slump, I'm going to explore non-quantitative research methods by taking a qualitative methods class next quarter. A weakness of our program is that we do not have a structured research methods sequence. It is extremely frustrating because we are supposed to be "doing research," but I feel ill equipped to do so. Since the quantitative-qualitative divide is so great, the department does not offer any required methods courses because it does not want to seem as though it endorses one method over another. Instead, we "learn" methods (sort of) through reading assigned class readings in our seminars. It's useful, but it still doesn't teach us how to "do" research. So, sometimes it feels like a sink or swim, but I had better learn to swim- and fast.

The 2nd Year Slump

It's the end of the quarter and finals are next week. I'm deep in the 2nd year slump. Apparently, this condition is so common that a phrase has been coined to describe it. To me, being in grad school is like being on a hamster wheel. The work is never ending, and when I take a break, I feel guilty. Anyway, I have felt the slump on and off this year. Most of us are plagued with the nagging feeling that grad school may not be the right path, but for some of us, the nagging feeling is louder and more difficult to ignore. I'm working on my qualifying paper right now, and my adviser is pleased that I seem to be on the right track and moving along just fine in the program. However, there is this nagging feeling inside of me that wonders if academia is the life that I want. I'm not sure if the never ending cycle of teaching, researching, and publishing is the life for me. While teaching and doing research is important, I'm not sure if this is the way that I want to leave my mark on society.

In happy news: I made coconut cupcakes and brownies last week. They put a smile on everyone's faces. Ever seen the movie 'Stranger than Fiction'? Well, there is this character that quit law school to open up her own bakery. Actually, I think she failed out of law school because she spent so much time baking for her study groups. There is this little part of me that wonders if I'd be happy and fulfilled by baking yummy goodies that will put smiles on people's faces. Anyway, I'm on a mission to find the best chocolate chip cookie recipe, so let me know if you have a good one for me to try.

Last night, my friend Chris and I went to see the UCI Men's Basketball team play UC Santa Barbara in the Big West semi final game. We won, so tonight we will be playing Cal State Fullerton in the Big West Championship game. If we beat Fullerton tonight, we will go on to the NCAA tournament, a first for UCI. This is exciting, and one of my current students plays for UCI, so I have a personal connection to the team. Tonight, my friends and I are going up to Anaheim to cheer on the Anteaters. Keep your fingers crossed, and think happy thoughts for UCI!

RIP JOC: December 2, 2006- February 28, 2008

I am sad to report that my red betta fish, Justice O'Connor has passed on. He died sometime on the afternoon of Thursday, February 28th. JOC lived a long and fulfilling life. We had many good times together- moving adventures and play dates with John Roberts. We also had some bad times, too- a near death experience down the garbage disposal. Anyway, JOC was a good fish.

In other news, I will be in Chicago at the beginning of April for the Midwest Political Science Association Conference. I am looking forward to being in Chicago again. I have already purchased a ticket to a Cubs game- very exciting.

We are nearly finished with the quarter, which means that there is a lot to do in so little time!

Fun in the Sun

My friends and I got out last weekend for some fresh air and leisurely exercise. We went hiking, something that I have not done since my Girl Scout Camp days (as a staff member, not a camper). We hiked the Holy Jim Falls Trail in the Cleveland National Forest. It was a bumpy ride out to the trail head, but we survived. Our hike was nice and leisurely, littered with many breaks to appreciate nature and snap photos. It felt really good to take a break from the daily grind and escape Orange County for the day.

Winter Quarter Halftime

We are halfway through the winter quarter now. Here's the latest update:

Classes are going well, and I think I'm finally starting to understand statistics. My students have an exam on Friday, so I'll be busy grading essays next week. In some exciting news, I finally bought a laptop. You can't really see this in the picture, but it is indeed pink. I have been busy writing, and my new computer makes it all the more enjoyable. Now I have no reason not to get my work done.

I also finished crocheting a tote bag. It turned out quite nicely, if I say so myself.

Of course, I've been baking- lots. Tonight I made Red Velvet Cupcakes. I ran out of red food coloring, so they're not super red. I did a taste test, and they're not too bad.

Happy Super Duper Tuesday!

Election 2008 is well underway. Since I am a total political science geek, I have to talk about it, right? This week's discussion sections in my Intro to US Government class was devoted to the nomination system and the electoral college. So, let's start from Square 1: The nomination process is how we will get McCain (hey, I think he's sealed the deal) vs either Obama or Clinton on the ballot this November. It is how we got Bush vs. Kerry in 2004, Bush vs. Gore in 2000, Clinton vs. Dole in 1996, well, you get the general idea. Now, each state has a primary or a caucus. They get to decide which one to have, so each is different. Simply put, a primary is an election and a caucus is a meeting.

Iowa and New Hampshire kick off the nomination circus. Why IA and NH? Well, it all started in 1972 and now it's tradition. There is no good reason. They garner a lot of candidate and media attention, which doesn't seem quite fair now considering how small they are, right? They set the agenda and narrow the presidential playing field. If you have a poor showing in these states, well, you can kiss the presidency good bye. Just ask Giuliani. As we move through the nomination process, candidates start to drop out like flies. This means that the states with primaries or caucuses early in the process get media attention and candidate attention. They have more clout and will start to narrow the playing field. Because of this, we see something called frontloading, which is when states move their primary or caucus to the front of this whole process. When you go early, you get choices because candidates have not yet thrown in the towel.

In my discussion section, the students consider the pros and cons of this system. It's a long process, and candidates need a lot of money to stay in the race. Also, aren't McCain, Obama, and Clinton neglecting their Senate duties?

I organized a department Happy Hour for the faculty and grad students to watch the election returns on Super Tuesday. It was our version of the Super Bowl. Attendance was great, and the evening was a success.