The Women's Potluck ended on a light-hearted moment. So, we were all joking about how people (usually the men - who feel the need to be unnecessarily competitive - in fact, I've never heard a woman do these things) like to brag about how often they work and how they are working on (take your pick) a qualifier, a publication, etc. Now, it has taken me quite some time to understand that 1) It is the insecure people who do the bragging, and 2) They are lying.
These insecure people like to brag about their workload, their current projects, and their CVs because they want to give the illusion that they are much smarter and progressing faster through the program than they really are. They are trying to make the rest of us feel inadequate, threatened, anxious, insecure, etc. These people used to make me feel this way until about halfway through winter quarter of last year. Now I get it. Those who are the smartest and the most successful in the program don't feel the need to talk about it. Trust me. The cohort superstars are humble, and you will rarely get them to talk about their accomplishments.
I have also realized that when these insecure people talk about what they are "working on" or how often they work, they are lying. Some people may claim to work 80 hours a week, but quite a bit of that time is spent surfing the internet, checking email, chatting with friends, watching youtube videos, etc. Hey, I don't claim to have worked 8 hours today; I know full well that I probably spent about 4 hours getting coffee, going out to lunch, and talking to my friends.
And so, the laughing continued last night as we joked about how people use the term "working on" loosely. Those people who claimed to have been "working on" qualifiers and publications last year? I have yet to see those come to fruition. Seriously, if they brag about "working on" these things, don't you think they would have bragged about their completion too? So, the women and I joked that "working on" is used loosely and can mean anything from reading a book, doing statistical analysis, thinking about a paper idea, or just opening up a word document and writing your name. We joked that we should do the latter and tell everyone that we are working on our dissertation. Right, and I'm also going to make a homemade picture book and tell everyone that I've published. And while I'm at it, I'll make my own journal and tell everyone that I'm "working on" some publications.
These insecure people like to brag about their workload, their current projects, and their CVs because they want to give the illusion that they are much smarter and progressing faster through the program than they really are. They are trying to make the rest of us feel inadequate, threatened, anxious, insecure, etc. These people used to make me feel this way until about halfway through winter quarter of last year. Now I get it. Those who are the smartest and the most successful in the program don't feel the need to talk about it. Trust me. The cohort superstars are humble, and you will rarely get them to talk about their accomplishments.
I have also realized that when these insecure people talk about what they are "working on" or how often they work, they are lying. Some people may claim to work 80 hours a week, but quite a bit of that time is spent surfing the internet, checking email, chatting with friends, watching youtube videos, etc. Hey, I don't claim to have worked 8 hours today; I know full well that I probably spent about 4 hours getting coffee, going out to lunch, and talking to my friends.
And so, the laughing continued last night as we joked about how people use the term "working on" loosely. Those people who claimed to have been "working on" qualifiers and publications last year? I have yet to see those come to fruition. Seriously, if they brag about "working on" these things, don't you think they would have bragged about their completion too? So, the women and I joked that "working on" is used loosely and can mean anything from reading a book, doing statistical analysis, thinking about a paper idea, or just opening up a word document and writing your name. We joked that we should do the latter and tell everyone that we are working on our dissertation. Right, and I'm also going to make a homemade picture book and tell everyone that I've published. And while I'm at it, I'll make my own journal and tell everyone that I'm "working on" some publications.
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