One of my dearest friends has a new boyfriend. She is a grad student; he is not. She wondered how she could possibly explain what grad school is like to him. I said: "Just tell him that grad school is a perpetual feeling of inadequacy." Sounds harsh, but it's pretty much the truth.
It's not an easy task to try to get people to understand what Ph.D. programs are like. I can see why. Grad school experiences differ by school, degree programs, and departments, among other things. I think that most people think that graduate school is like college, but on steroids. It's not. Sure, grad school is classes, reading, writing, and constant homework, but that's where the similarity ends. If college is like dining in a restaurant, then a Ph.D. program is like learning to be the chef.
I am always curious as to why people go to grad school, particularly a Ph.D. program. What sort of person subjects her/himself to the emotional rollercoaster of grad school? What sort of person subjects her/himself to constant criticism? What does this say about us? About me? I always wonder if we really know what we're getting ourselves into. I mean, we can think we know what grad school is like, but we don't really know what it's like until we're there. I imagine that it's like getting married. You may think you're prepared and that you know what it's going to be like, but I imagine that there are some surprises.
I recently heard grad school described as a hazing process, and I think this sums it up quite nicely. It really is a hazing process, and well, if you survive, then welcome to academia. When I started grad school, everyone said you have to have a thick skin to survive, and I didn't quite understand. Now I do. Everything you write, everything you think, and everything you say is subject to critique, all in the name of "contributing to knowledge." Whenever I get feedback on my papers, I sometimes have to remind myself that the critiques are meant to help me improve, not hurt my feelings. And it works. We learn, we get better, we improve. I've heard grad school described as a video game; once you master one level, you move onto the next. This too is true.
I'll end this on a positive note. I just finished a full draft of my prospectus, which is like a detailed research design of my dissertation. It's like my road map of what I intend to study and how I intend to study it. Coming up with my research question seemed like it took forever, and sometimes I wasn't sure that there was one out there that I'd like to answer. But it turns out that there is. It didn't just fall from the sky (these things never do, as my adviser, DK, says); I found it after a lot of reading, writing, and rewriting.
After I submitted my draft, DK congratulated me and told me that she was really looking forward to reading it. She asked if I felt good about getting it done, and I really hadn't thought about it. Sometimes our accomplishments seem so anti-climactic, and many times we forget to pat ourselves (and each other) on the back. But amidst the criticism and negativity of grad school, it feels great when your adviser (and others, of course) pats you on the back and recognizes that you've cleared a hurdle, no matter how small, even if you yourself don't recognize it. Grad school does have its rewards.
It's not an easy task to try to get people to understand what Ph.D. programs are like. I can see why. Grad school experiences differ by school, degree programs, and departments, among other things. I think that most people think that graduate school is like college, but on steroids. It's not. Sure, grad school is classes, reading, writing, and constant homework, but that's where the similarity ends. If college is like dining in a restaurant, then a Ph.D. program is like learning to be the chef.
I am always curious as to why people go to grad school, particularly a Ph.D. program. What sort of person subjects her/himself to the emotional rollercoaster of grad school? What sort of person subjects her/himself to constant criticism? What does this say about us? About me? I always wonder if we really know what we're getting ourselves into. I mean, we can think we know what grad school is like, but we don't really know what it's like until we're there. I imagine that it's like getting married. You may think you're prepared and that you know what it's going to be like, but I imagine that there are some surprises.
I recently heard grad school described as a hazing process, and I think this sums it up quite nicely. It really is a hazing process, and well, if you survive, then welcome to academia. When I started grad school, everyone said you have to have a thick skin to survive, and I didn't quite understand. Now I do. Everything you write, everything you think, and everything you say is subject to critique, all in the name of "contributing to knowledge." Whenever I get feedback on my papers, I sometimes have to remind myself that the critiques are meant to help me improve, not hurt my feelings. And it works. We learn, we get better, we improve. I've heard grad school described as a video game; once you master one level, you move onto the next. This too is true.
I'll end this on a positive note. I just finished a full draft of my prospectus, which is like a detailed research design of my dissertation. It's like my road map of what I intend to study and how I intend to study it. Coming up with my research question seemed like it took forever, and sometimes I wasn't sure that there was one out there that I'd like to answer. But it turns out that there is. It didn't just fall from the sky (these things never do, as my adviser, DK, says); I found it after a lot of reading, writing, and rewriting.
After I submitted my draft, DK congratulated me and told me that she was really looking forward to reading it. She asked if I felt good about getting it done, and I really hadn't thought about it. Sometimes our accomplishments seem so anti-climactic, and many times we forget to pat ourselves (and each other) on the back. But amidst the criticism and negativity of grad school, it feels great when your adviser (and others, of course) pats you on the back and recognizes that you've cleared a hurdle, no matter how small, even if you yourself don't recognize it. Grad school does have its rewards.
1 comment:
Amen!
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